Adventures with Pookie

High Dive

2011-12-30T00:37:00.003-06:00

Whew.

This past semester was crazy. Going, going, going. Always having to be on top of my game, always ready to perform, always prepared for evaluations, presentations and whatever else came my way. During this time, I did short sprints toward the end of the week, just needing to survive until Friday afternoon so I could just crash.

Next semester begins the marathon. The continued going. Not only will I be student teaching in both a 5th grade and 7th grade Social Studies classroom but also delving into some hardcore fundraising for The World Race (only $14,000 to go...). I can already feel the tiredness creeping up on me as I prepare for my last semester at school and giving up everything I own to go around the world.

Oh boy. It's going to be a rough one.

I'm sitting on the edge of the high dive, ready to take a leap and free fall into the pool below. I'm ready. I've been working up to this moment. I can't wait to actually do it. Finally experience what I always thought of as the future. But I can't jump in just yet. There's a knot in my stomach. What if I fail? What if I find myself climbing down the ladder, shakily holding onto the rungs, disappointed that I couldn't make it and full of shame?

I can only close my eyes and hope for the best.

This post went nowhere near where I intended it to go. Maybe that was necessary.

A Christmas Wish

2011-12-22T23:12:00.000-06:00

This morning a friend of mine emailed me a most unexpected email. She works at a recreation center in town and her department is in charge of the Santa's Mailbox each year. Around Christmastime, children put in letters to Santa and her department has the special responsibility of answering them.

Yesterday, she received two special letters in Santa's Mailbox, not from children but rather a husband and wife. Usually I don't read cheesy emails like this but the sincerity of their hearts struck me and their letters reminded me about the basic message that the birth of Jesus brought to the world: There is hope for tomorrow.

Transcript:

Dear Saint Nicholas,

it has been a long time since I have written you a letter, but Christmas is a time for child-like faith and so this year I choose to believe in you.

I am not asking for the latest Xbox game, Cabbage-Patch doll, or shiny new bicycle. Instead, my wife and I are adopting two children from the Democratic Republic of Congo and we would like to ask you for a favor.

You and your reindeer travel the world on Christmas Eve delivering toys to girls and boys. We do not know if our children have been naughty or nice, but we are certain that they are loved. Although we have never met, we already miss them more than words can express.

This Christmas Eve, when you visit the orphanage in K***, could you make sure that our chilren are tucked in and safe? And we would ask that you whisper to them a simple message, in French, while they sleep:

"Votre mere et votre pere vous aime beaucoup. Ils viennent a vous ramener chez vous bientot."

(Your mother and father love you very much. They are coming to take you home soon.)

Thank you Santa, and next year we look forward to welcoming you to our home and delivering presents to two children who will be enjoying their first Christmas in Tennessee.

Grace and peace this holiday season,

Ken J.

Transcript:

Dear Santa,

I know I'm a little old to be writing you a letter, or even to be telling you what I want, but before you put me on the naughty list, know that this letter isn't for me. It's for my kids.

My kids are Rose and Emmanuel. They are ages 3 and 5, and they live in an orphanage in the Democratic Republic of Congo. We're in the process of adopting them, and things have come to a standstill since October. There had been an election, and rioting, and much instability in the country. We were hoping to be traveling to get them this time of year, but we still have months of paperwork and processes to go through before we can get them. I don't know for sure if they even know we exist, or know that they are loved.

So, here are my Christmas wishes:

Would you let Rose and Emmanuel know that they are loved and that we are desperately trying to bring them home?
Would you make sure that their mosquito netting is snuggly around them and that they have a toy or blanket to cuddle with?
Would you fill their caregivers with an extra amount of love, joy, and patience, and help their security guard to be brave and strong?
Would you give them the gift of laughter on Christmas day--even though they may not even realize what day it is?
Most of all, would you protect the places in their hearts that are meant to be occupied by a mom, a dad, and Jesus, so that they don't give up hope too soon?

I know this is a lot to ask for, but I'd appreciate your help. I know you have lots of connections. Next Christmas, I hope to be helping Rose and Emmanuel to write letters of their own.

Merry Christmas!

Robin J.

Bigger or Better

2011-12-10T08:35:00.001-06:00

Oh hey...

It's been a rather long time since I've updated hasn't it? Sorry about that, first there was this nasty paper about the character of Satan in Paradise Lost (it was a rather demonic time to say the least) (pun definitely intended). Then a crazy portfolio demanded all my attention like a needy boyfriend. Now we're onto finals week and while it's been chaotic, I think I've just gotten used to pandemonium in my life.

But let's move on to the fun things that I've been managing to squeeze in, shall we?

A few weekends ago, I was able to lead a D-NOW weekend with my very own youth group back home and wow, what a blast!

D-NOW weekends are youth group retreats that last a full weekend. A short glimpse of what happens goes like this: eat junk food, talk about Jesus, eat more junk food. Go to a church service, go sleep at a somebody's house, get in our jammies and eat more junk food. While talking about Jesus. Wake up at an ungodly hour after getting <4 hours of sleep and pretend to be hyped up for life while trying to wake up seven-ish teenage girls. Go back to church, eat junk food, play some ridiculous games and talking more about Jesus. Repeat for another full day. Sunday morning challenge: staying awake throughout the entire church service while only getting seven hours of sleep during the whole weekend.

No joke, D-NOW weekends are the highlight of my month. Ultimate party.

While I work at an incredible ministry where I lead DNOW weekends once every few weeks, to come home and be able to do this was incredible as I got to be with my Jesus family!

____________________________________________________________________

Jesus Family (noun): In the Bible, Paul talks about how once we accept Christ, we become sons and daughters of God and all other believers are our brothers and sisters (Galatians 3:28). A Jesus Family is merely the group of fellow believers that meet with one another and encourage/love/sometimes rebuke each other. Yes, basically this is a church but I prefer Jesus Family for two reasons:

Church has become a tainted word in that it no longer means 'the body of Christ' but rather a building. I don't love a building, I love people. It's hard to communicate with someone about the intimacy of God's love when they're constantly thinking of a building or even worse, a group of distant cold-hearted people that judge a person once they step through the door.
I like the word family because it's real. Coming from a family who's experienced brokenness, I love seeing groups of people practicing true love in encouraging one another, seeking advice from each other, and merely asking how one is doing without simply taking "fine" as an answer. Of course there's fighting, just like a real family. There's arguing, disappointment, and jealousy as we're still human but there's still love that transcends all of that, as families do (Romans 12:5, Hebrews 10:25, Matthew 12:50, 1 TImothy 5:1-2).

I like to think of this as my Jesus Family's awkward family photo

_____________________________________________________________________________

So anyways, back to my adventures. At one point in the weekend, we played a game called "Bigger or Better".

The rules of Bigger or Better are simple. Each team is given a small object like a golf ball. They then have a certain amount of time to go to random strangers and ask if they would be willing to trade for the golf ball that's bigger or better than the ball. Whoever brought back the best thing won.

So with a 1.5 hour limit and a group of middle school girls to join me, we set off to auction off our ball.

I was expecting to come back with some cheesy item that even Goodwill wouldn't accept, but boy was I wrong!

Our first trade happened in a random neighborhood as we saw a man unloading groceries. Luckily for us, he loved golf and traded us the golf ball for...

A blue velvet sombrero!

Then we knocked on the next door and tried to convince the lady to take our sombrero. At first she thought we were crazy, which was acceptable, and said she didn't have anything to trade. But as we were walking away, she stopped us and said that she did have something:

Elvis. Cardboard, life-size Elvis. Who was motion-sensored and spoke Elvis-y sayings.

Oh the things people have in their houses.

Although we knew that we would definitely win with Elvis, we decided to keep on trying since we had a good hour left in our adventure.

Then we arrived to another house who's garage door was open. We tempted him with motion-sensored Elvis and although he didn't want Elvis, he did have something to give away:

We hit the mother lode.

Unfortunately, I don't have the picture with us and the piano as another girl took that photo but there's nothing better than calling your youth pastor and asking to borrow his truck. "Why?" "...because we found a piano". I bet he wasn't expecting that one.

So we did win, but here's the kicker:

We got back to the church to show off our goods and between the nine groups that went out, this is what we acquired:

1 piano
5 couches (yes 5!)
3 various other pieces of furniture
1 bunk bed
1 horse from a carousel
1 laptop missing its battery
an old xbox
a firepit
1 puppy (turned out that that group went to their house, no worries he has a good home)
Various other things like: a dollhouse, a Predators hockey stick, a punching bag, other stuff that was found in people's garages.

Turns out many of these people had these things for a long time but just never had the transportation or manpower to get rid of the big objects like the piano so when a group of teenagers came knocking on doors to take anything, it was more of a godsend than to them than anything else.

*Note to self: when furnishing my first apartment, play Bigger or Better first before buying anything!

(also, sorry for the long post! Like I said, it's been a while!)

21 Things I'm Thankful For

2011-11-24T12:46:00.001-06:00

I am thankful for...

Ten person fort. Tangled. Love.

My family because they understand that I'm weird and they still accept me
Friends that will spend hours with you in silence as they do their own thing, because they're that comfortable with you
My brothers and sisters in my Jesus family who will build giant forts and watch Tangled inside with me.
Hammocks. And beautiful days to lay in hammocks and read.
Jesus. Because He's really cool and loves us even when we don't deserve it.
Sleepovers. Just because we get older doesn't mean we should stop having them.
My job. Although I hate going, I'm still blessed to have a job.
My mom's cooking and that she's teaching me to share it with others.
My dog. Sometimes you just need someone to love you without judgement.
Potlucks. I really hope heaven involves a massive potluck and all the joy that comes with it.
Roommates who understand how stressful life is and will burst out in crazed, stressed laughter at 2 am to elevate the tension.
People who sincerely promise to support me on The World Race.
Hugs. Not just a greeting hug, but those strong yet comforting, gripping hugs that is a reminder of how loved you are.
Serious, I-want-to-know-your-life chats. That's how you know people care.
Dreams coming true:

Kids that share snacks with you because they want to be your friend.
The moments where an acquaintance becomes a friend
Roadtrips with awesome people. They didn't even have to be your friends when you started, but they are now.
Pictures of basset hounds running. Gets me every time.

Good hair days. It really does make all the difference.

Thanks to you guys also for going through all these adventures with me!

Upcoming Adventures: The World Race

2011-11-13T07:47:00.001-06:00

I want to change the world.

I know this sounds rather forward, but, then again, pastors and Sunday School teachers have been quoting Luke 1:37 (“Nothing is impossible with God”) to me my entire life, so I decided to dream big on this one.

In May, I will be graduating from Lee University with a degree in Middle School Education. Then, in July, I will be headed off with a missions program called The World Race to 11 different countries: Bulgaria, Romania, Kenya, Rwanda, Uganda, Malaysia, Thailand, Cambodia, Honduras, Nicaragua, and Guatemala for 11 months (11 countries in 11 months). Through The World Race and its parent organization, Adventures In Missions, I will be working alongside various churches and organizations to assist the missionaries living full time in each of these countries in reaching out and sharing God’s love among the nations. During this time, I will be involved with many various ministries, including youth ministries, orphanages, teaching English, manual labor, evangelism, and ministries reaching out to prostitutes and victims of sex trafficking.

However, I can’t change the world until I’m changed first.

So, for those 11 months, I will be joining with a team of about seven other World Race participants and live in a close and raw community with them. I’ll be giving up a home, adequate sleep, food, and even basic hygiene, and instead choose to live out of a backpack and on only $3 per day for food. In doing this, I will experience the world as, well… the way most of the world does. In breaking out of my protected and comfortable world here, I have the opportunity to experience life with bodies of believers in other nations and cultures other than my own.

If you’re wondering whether or not I’m crazy, that’s OK. I wasn’t entirely sure about the whole thing myself. But my passion has always been to serve people, especially “the least of these,” and I truly cannot wait to show people the love of God on this experience.

I’m so excited, and, honestly, completely nervous about this trip. To change the world, I must be changed first, and I cannot wait to see where the Lord takes me on this adventure.

I am asking for your support on this journey. I need A LOT of prayer. Like I previously stated, I will be traveling to 11 different countries, most of which are NOT Christian nations and involved in ministries that bring light to dark, dark places such as prostitution ministries in Thailand, sex trafficking in Cambodia and Moldova and ongoing conflicts in numerous nations. Pray that we can reach out to the outcasts of the world and bring them hope. Pray that God brings to us the people who need to hear about God’s love and for open hearts. Pray for safety and protection for us as we continually travel.

To be completely frank, I must also raise $16,000 for the trip, and I have absolutely no idea how I alone can raise that amount of money. I know things may have been tight lately, but if you can help me out in any way, I would greatly appreciate it! To send donations, you can mail your tax-deductible contribution to:

Adventures In Missions

P.O. Box 534470

Atlanta, GA 30353-4470

And be sure to indicate the purpose of your gift in the memo line: The World Race (Pookie Vergara).

You can also visit my blog at http://pookievergara.theworldrace.org and click on the “Support Me!” tab to contribute online, as well as get updates on my adventures before and during my time on The World Race. (This blog will still be up and running of course, but it will probably be better to check up on my activities on the world race blog once I actually go).

In the coming year, I hope not only to be a blessing to those I serve, but also to you. I would be honored to go as your representative to bring Christ Jesus to nations around the world. May God bless you as you prayerfully consider partnering with me in this ministry.

If you would like to know more about The World Race and the plan that God has been putting in my life, please feel free to email me (stephanieprvergara@gmail.com) and I would love to get in contact with you!

Thank you,

Stephanie “Pookie” Vergara

Top Ten: Favorite Songs

2011-11-08T12:05:00.000-06:00

So I'm in the process of writing a huge 20-ish page paper but I'm taking a short break since my attention span completely died a few minutes ago.

Since I'll probably be out of focus for the next few weeks, here's a few of my favorites in top 10 form. Tonight, we'll be starting with my favorite songs:

The Call: Regina Spektor. By far my favorite song of all time! With the past few years of my life involving seasons of meeting lots of crazy amazing people and having to say goodbye, this song reminds me that there's no need to say goodbye to the people you love.
O' Blessed Child: The Candy Shop soundtrack. First of all, watch the movie when you can. It's a 30 minute movie about child sex trafficking but so incredibly good. This song basically wraps up all emotions that comes up when dealing with hurting people. Yeah, all that in a song.
Beautiful Things: Gungor. Favorite worship song of all time, no doubt. Who hasn't felt like a discarded piece of trash before? Well, God takes junk and makes it beautiful.
Through Heaven's Eyes: Prince of Egypt soundtrack. The best 3:42 of instant bar mitzvah one could ever want. Try and listen to this song and not dance, it's impossible.
All About Us: He Is We feat. Owl City. I'm pretty sure the first day I got this song, I listened to it about twenty times. And it didn't stop for at least a week. After listening to this song, you can't help but smile really goofy and have a strong urge to dance. I hope this is what love sounds like.
Wunderkind: Alanis Morissette. Ok let's be completely honest. Practically every single song from any Chronicles of Narnia soundtrack is my favorite. This includes "This is Home" by Switchfoot, "Can't Take It In" by Imogen Heap, "There's A Place For Us" by Carrie Underwood and all the musical creations by Harry Gregson-Williams.
Indelible: Brooke Fraiser. This song just inspires me to be more. That doesn't entirely make sense but sometimes, just remembering how much a great and incredible God loves me motivates me to strive and be a better person. This is also the song that inspired me to go on The World Race.
Expressions: Helen Jane Long. Just listen to the song. If I had a soundtrack to my life, this would be in it and in my crazy, bouncing off the walls life, being able to listen to this song for a few minutes helps me to relax and refocus.
Lions!: LIGHTS. Lions make you brave. Giants bring you faith. Death is a charade. You don't have to feel safe to feel unafraid. That's all you need to know.
Falling In Love In A Coffee Shop: Landon Pigg. I listened to this song once and had a crush on the song. It's beautiful, it's real, like number 5, I hope that this is what love sounds like.

Never Praying For A Distraction Again

2011-10-31T22:07:00.000-05:00

Warning to all my male readers: caution.

I just spent the last half hour talking to a young girl from a D-Now that I led a while ago about her first period on Facebook chat.

That's the last time I ever go on Facebook praying for a distraction.

Oh, and I AM SO NOT READY TO BE A PARENT.

"The horror! The horror!"

--Kurtz in The Heart of Darkness

(Basically the same meaning)

Night Wanderer

2011-10-29T11:03:00.000-05:00

Thecrisp, cool night air wakes up the great lion as it breezes through hismajestic mane. Aslan looks up to the clear and cloudless night sky where thestars reign. His friends are up there, but they are hard to see. Although thelighted campus brings safety, it also pollutes the night sky, hiding thebrilliance of the stars’ light. Sadly, sometimes, even the best intentions canblock what’s true.

Yearningto fully gaze upon the stars, Aslan stretches from his slumber and jumpsthrough the windowsill onto the plush grass below. Strolling through theuniversity’s campus, the majestic beast revels in the solitude that comes fromthe hours just before sunrise. He finds a lonesome soccer ball and plays withit for a while, tumbling and wrestling with his prey. Victorious, the championhunter leaves the deflated kill and continues on his mission to see theheavenly hosts.

Thegurgling sound of the fountain is pleasant to the untamed creature’s ears as ittones out the sounds of cars, factories and a passing train. This is hisfavorite spot, a garden laden with flowers blooming in this tiny utopian corner.Aslan walks up to the fountain and sits on the ledge to drink the cool, clearwater. Then, he looks straight up at the stars. He misses them and once beingable to walk among the stars. He knows them all, by name, and silently greetsthem, admiring their beauty. Yet although Aslan wishes to be with them, heknows that he must stay here for the time being. He is needed.

Yawning,Aslan sees that the sun will be coming up to greet the world soon andwordlessly says goodbye to his old friends. The lion begins to make his wayback into room 206. Ambling back through campus, Aslan happens upon a poorcollege student walking home for a few hours of precious sleep. The young manstares at Aslan from across the street, enraptured by the great lion’s size andmagnificence. The student’s eyes connect with Aslan’s and in that moment, theboy experiences peace and a trembling fear of being near something so great.But then, he realizes that he is staring at a lion in the middle of campus andshakes his head, muttering that he really needs to stop drinking so much coffeelate at night. As he walks off, Aslan watches him go. Sometimes people can’teven believe what their eyes are seeing.

Asthe night wanderer goes back into small apartment room, he gazes back up at thesky. The quiet pale streaks of the sunrise have already overpowered the lightof the stars but Aslan can still see a lone faint star clinging to the night.As the sun gets brighter, Aslan says one final goodbye to the star until thenext night and curls up for his sleep till his next adventure.

Gentle Whisper

2011-10-20T23:59:00.002-05:00

The LORD said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by.”
Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.
1 Kings 19:11-13

Student teach at a school. Class. Work. Class. Quick lunch break. Work. Meeting. Three hour long class that makes me want to crawl in a hole and die. Frantically write a paper due before midnight. Meeting. More paper writing. Pull an all-nighter.

This is generally how each of my weeknights go. Going, going, going. Sleeping and eating take a backseat in lieu of schoolwork. These past few weeks I've been stretched rather thin, leaving me fearing that I'm headed for a serious burnout.

But then, in the hectic ridiculousness of my day, something happens that helps me to remember that I'm not just a machine.

Laughing with friends in hammocks.

Eating tacos and deep conversations.

Goofing off with my roommates.

In the midst of all the chaos, while I'm struggling to finish everything in my day, desperately wishing for a little help, there's always a quiet whisper, reminding me that God's still there, knowing exactly what I need to keep me going.

Sometimes the gentle whisper can't be fully appreciated until the chaos is experienced.

Today Is Just One Of Those Days

2011-10-11T20:19:00.000-05:00

You know those times of days.

It's been drizzling miserably all day, meaning that my hair is ridiculously frizzy

I change into warm, comfy sweatpants and walk outside for a few seconds only to find that the bottoms of my sweatpants are soaked.

I try and be nice to people, but instead I fail.

I have no reason to be on edge, yet I am.

I should be working on a project but I just don't care about it

So instead, I spent about two pointless hours in my already crammed day to aimlessly surf the web.

I can't stop being such an angry badger.

(Honey Badgers are one of the most fearless and worst creatures to come across, especially when angry. I have a friend that refers to people as angry badgers as a more creative term for 'jerk')

___________________________

It's just one of those days, an Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day type of day.

Nothing wrong happened to set me off and in all honesty, it wasn't that bad of a day

My attitude just needs to get checked.

Then, hopefully tomorrow won't be like today,

For today can be a very dangerous type of day.

Move Over Disney Princesses, There's A New Heroine In Town

2011-10-04T13:01:00.000-05:00

Sorry about being gone for so long, school has been rather demanding lately and I've haven't been able to sit down and write. Except today. Today's just been one of those "who needs school?" days. Anyway, a while ago, I had mentioned that I was reading Mark Twain's Joan of Arc.

One of my favorite things about this book is that the great American writer, Mark Twain, has such an admiration and fondness for Joan that he writes about her in the same affection as one would write about their first love. The usually biting satirist was quoted saying, "I like Joan of Arc best of all my books; and it is the best; I know it perfectly well.” and considered this his most important work as Twain spent twelve years researching Joan's life. This was how he described her,

"In the history of the human intellect, untrained, inexperienced, and using only its birthright equipment of untried capacities, there is nothing which approaches this. Joan of Arc stands alone, and must continue to stand alone, by reason of the unfellowed fact that in the things wherein she was great she was so without shade or suggestion of help from preparatory teaching, practice, environment, or experience. There is no one to compare her with, none to measure her by; for all others among the illustrious grew towards their high place in an atmosphere and surroundings which discovered their gift to them and nourished it and promoted it, intentionally or unconsciously. There have been other young generals, but they were not girls; young generals, but they had been soldiers before they were generals: she began as a general; she commanded the first army she ever saw; she led it from victory to victory, and never lost a battle with it; there have been young commanders-in-chief, but none so young as she: she is the only soldier in history who has held the supreme command of a nation's armies at the age of seventeen."

At age twelve, Joan saw her first vision, of the saints Michael, Catherine, and Margaret, telling her to drive the English out of France, who had been invading France for over ninety years. Generations had passed, and the French people had simply gotten used to living under English oppression. But Joan knew that she was called, and she never gave up hope. She had to drive the English out of France.

At age sixteen, she went to court to ask for an army. She was immediately laughed at and turned down. Yet Joan knew that she couldn't give up. So she went back.

Through her persistence, Joan of Arc found herself before the Dauphin (to be king) of France. A lowly peasant girl who didn't know how to read was meeting with the Dauphin. I can only imagine what it would be like, a young girl meeting with the President and his cabinet. She would likely be laughed at, patted on the head and told to leave the important things to the adults.

Instead, Joan got herself an army. Historians of The Hundred Years' War write about how King Charles must have been at the last resort stage, willing to accept any offer for help, including that of a sixteen year old girl.

Within the year, Joan had driven out all the French around her.

She led an army, got severely injured twice (once being an arrow to the neck), and saved a nation all by the age of seventeen.

When the Dauphin, now king, asked Joan what he could give her in return for saving his kingdom, all she asked was that she could go home and that the king never tax her village.

She didn't want riches, or a lifetime of living in a castle. She just wanted her neighbors to not have to live in poverty.

And then she was captured by the English and accused of being a heretic.

Yet, she did not lose heart.

For three months, the nineteen year old, uneducated, illiterate girl held her own in court against the best minds in England. And although Joan was convicted, later readings of the court transcripts show that the English clergy prosecuting her had doctored many of the court records, meaning that a group of over 30 of the most educated and powerful men in England had to cheat their way into winning a trial against a teenage girl.

She was burned at the stake a few days later but later was canonized by the same church who had convicted her.

One girl. One young girl who simply heard the voice of God.

Who believed the voice of God.

She encountered countless dragons, and through only faith, overcame every obstacle thrown in her way.

And in her small steps of obedience, she saved a nation.

"All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance, admitting that they were foreigners and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them...There were others who were tortured, refusing to be released so that they might gain an even better resurrection. Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. They were put to death by stoning; they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground. These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised, since God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect." Hebrews 11:13-16, 35-40

Why more movies haven't been made about her is beyond me.

Around The World In...11 Months?

2011-09-19T16:49:00.000-05:00

Prayer. Prayer. Prayer.

Answer.

When I was sixteen, I told God that once I graduated high school, I would go anywhere He wanted me to go and do whatever He asked of me. I was ready to hop on a plane and serve the outcasts in a far away country to live out the rest of my days.

Then, He called me to the exotic country of the United States of America.

That's not exactly what I was thinking.

A few months later, there was a last minute opportunity to be a counselor at my church's middle school summer camp, so I went.

And I loved it.

That's when I realized that God was needing me to stay here in the United States to work with middle schoolers.

Really God? When I said I would go anywhere and I would do anything, that's not really what I had in mind.

But God gave me a passion for teenagers and I've truly loved every minute and every opportunity that I've been given.

But still, I kinda wanted to be a missionary.

This summer, for the first time in years, I asked God if I could go out and serve people around the world.

He said yes.

Simple as that. I asked my Father for something and He agreed. Looking back, I definitely wasn't ready as a teenager. He had other things to show me and people who had to help me grow and become vulnerable with.

So now I go. Well, after I graduate.

In July, I'm headed out with Adventures In Missions' The World Race where I travel to 11 countries in 11 months so that I can serve all the nations of the world. Right now, I'll be headed to Bulgaria, Romania, Rwanda, Uganda, Kenya, Thailand, Malaysia, Cambodia, Nicaragua, Honduras, and Guatemala, but it will most likely change in the upcoming months.

I'll update more later about it all when I know more exact details but I did want to let you guys know. I'm going to need a lot of prayer as I prepare for the next ten months, especially as I'll have to raise about $16,000 and having to finish off my last year of school (student teaching...grrr) but I am so excited for what's to come!

It's funny though. As soon as I come back from my crazy adventures, I'll be headed right back to where I planned: teaching middle school in America.

God gave me a plan and I intend to follow it. But He also knew my desires and what I wanted and took that into consideration.

I asked and received.

That's how the Father's love works. Sometimes not how we expect, but all in His time.

"You say you have a plan for me

And that you want the best for my life

Told me the world had yet to see

What you can do with one

That's committed to Your calling

I know of course what I should do

That I can't hold these dreams forever

If I give them now to You

Will You take them away forever?

Or can I dream again?"

--Surrender by Barlow Girl

Is This The Real Life? Is This Just Fantasy?

2011-09-18T22:43:00.002-05:00

Get random text message telling me to go over to my friend's place

Go over to find a dance party happening

End up dancing with the band Family Force 5

Also Bohemian Rhapsody is one of my favorite songs to sing to while in heavy traffic.

Welcome to my life.

Blog Hopping

2011-09-16T00:50:00.002-05:00

This week I've been guest blogging for my good friend and mentor, Amy Beth, so be sure to check out her blog (Ministry So Fabulous)! She's absolutely fantastic!

(And I enjoy making random appearances whenever I can!)

Rainy Day

2011-09-07T22:16:00.000-05:00

You know that annoying thing that you swear you're forgetting whenever you move/travel somewhere? That thing would be my umbrella. Of course I didn't realize it until it started flooding outside.

The rain won't stop pouring down and half of the day has been spent fording rivers that suddenly sprang up along my college campus. This could be one of the few days that I have an excuse to come to class barefoot and not having to care about my appearance as everything can be blamed on the ongoing monsoon.

The other part of my day has been spent baking bread in my warm pajamas while listening to the Lord Of The Rings soundtrack.

Secret family recipe.

So sacred that I keep it written down in my personal journal with my innermost thoughts

No Computer= More People Visited, More Books Read, More Adventures To Be Had

2011-08-29T21:50:00.005-05:00

Tonight, I cooked about 5 pounds worth of pasta.

Then, I invited anyone that I could possibly grab ahold of.

Soon, my tiny apartment was filled with people. I kept having to wash plates as soon as people were finished so that others could eat and people shared silverware.

So much laughter and joy danced around as stomachs were filled and college students finally had a satisfying meal.

Later, as I sat in my now empty apartment as dirty dishes overflowed the sink, I rejoiced.

No matter how hilarious a movie or TV show may be, it could never compare to the amount of laughter that came from simply having conversations with people.

Community was built tonight. Not just friendships or connections, but unity.

All the believers were together and had everything in common. They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people.
--Acts 2:44-47

Moments like these help me to remember that the greatest things that God has given us are what can never be duplicated or experienced on TV.

Always On The Move

2011-08-12T17:19:00.007-05:00

Packing up to go back to school in less than a week.

I love it there. So many adventures with great people, living in a tight-knit community with others and always going, going, going.

But I love it here too. Life is slower, less complicated. There's community here too, smaller yet more intimate.

Divided between two families.

This is my fourth year doing this and you would think it would get easier but I don't think it ever will until we get to heaven.

Then, I can't wait for the epic potluck and family reunion that will happen.

But until then, I'll keep searching for a place to call home.

My favorite spot in my current home:

Sleeping in a hammock because my bed is cluttered with college things,

surrounded by books and art.

Fighting Dragons

2011-08-08T21:25:00.003-05:00

I finally finished and I'll have to admit, this is perhaps my favorite thing I've made. The inspiration came from one of my favorite quotes:

"Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten."

--G.K. Chesterton

I spent a lot of time researching dragons. Surprisingly, there are a lot of people out there who believe that dragons still exist as well as a ridiculous amount of information on the anatomy and habits of these fire-breathing beasts.

Made with paper, crayons, paint and lots of cardboard.

**Sorry for the poor quality of the pictures, they were taken on my cell phone as the camera that I owned for three weeks was accidently destroyed by a group of middle school boys while at camp.

Braver Than You Believe

2011-08-05T00:31:00.006-05:00

This week has been phenomenal. The kids I nanny for are out of town and I have the whole week off meaning that since I'm the only person in my house during the day and I have no other pressing deadlines, I can do whatever I want (as long as I remember to empty out the dishwasher).

So I've been making art.

Hopefully I'll be done with it within the week to show you, but in the meantime, here are some things that have been inspiring me this past week:

"If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together... there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart... I'll always be with you." --Winnie the Pooh

Joan of Arc by Mark Twain. I absolutely love this book and I'm only on the tenth page. Joan's always been one of my heroes but Twain writes about her with such affection that I can't help but want to aspire to be like anyone who is described as "truthful when lying was the common speech of man; honest when honesty became a lost virtue; a keeper of promises when the keeping of a promise was expected of no one; steadfast when stability was unknown...". Twain actually goes on like that for a full two pages and those are merely the first pages. So yes, I aspire to be someone like that.

Actually, the inspiration to read this book came from this article by Jon Foreman. It's a stirring piece of work that motivates me to face my dragons.

Lions make you brave,

Giants give you faith,

Death is a charade.

You don't have to feel safe to feel unafraid.

Lions! by LIGHTS

It Is Well WIth My Soul

2011-07-29T00:48:00.005-05:00

I'm sitting outside on my roof tonight, joined with my cat and a gazillion stars outside. The neighborhood is still. It's hot and sticky out here as the humidity never goes away, even after the sun has gone.

I can't help but fall in love with the stars. Each time I go out to look at them I fall more in love with God.

Tonight, it is quiet.

Usually, God and I have some intense moments together. Sometimes, He admonishes me, challenges me or breaks me open. Every time, He tells me how much He loves me.

Not tonight. Tonight, He is quiet. And so am I.

It's not a bad thing. He's merely showing me that I need to rest. To be still.

God likes to speak in the silence. Sometimes, that is when He is most powerful.

So many wonderful things have happened this summer. Adventures to different places. Living in community with people who won't accept "Good" as an answer when asking how your day is going. Moments when people say "You too? I thought I was the only one!" and striking up friendships with acquaintances after sharing a laugh together.

So much praying has happened as well. I am truly scared of what lies ahead in the too-near future because it's so unknown. So many "what ifs" and ideas of what is to come. Countless decisions have to be made soon and I have no idea which one to choose.

But as for this moment, listening to the quiet and resting under the stars, it is well with my soul

"I am not a bold man even though I want to be

I am just a dreamer with a timid history
Scared of confrontations I fume all through the night
The world has it's hold on me and I just want to fly
The sky, the sky is open wide
But I can't fly 'til I step aside
Rest easy
Have no fear
I love you perfectly
And perfect love drives out fear
I'll take your burden
You take my grace
Rest easy
In my embrace"

Rest Easy by Audio Adrenaline

What Heaven Is Going To Be Like

2011-07-23T21:23:00.006-05:00

A few years ago, I worked as a counselor at a summer camp near my hometown. While at camp, I found my best friend in the camp director's son, an imaginative 5 year old whom we all called Muff (his older sister nicknamed him "Muffin" but we shortened it to Muff to make it sound tougher). One of my favorite parts of the summer was finding him during my free time to play "Cowboys and Indians" or any other imaginative game that involved in him shooting me. Note: I die spectacular deaths. Muff even created a Pookie dance for me every time I came around and it's fair to say that Muff is one of my favorite people I've ever met.

Anyway, my sister is working again this year at the camp and frequently sees Muff on an everyday basis. This afternoon she sent me the following text, proving that Muff is one of the greatest children I have ever met:

"I asked Muff what he thought we'd do in heaven & he said he wanted to watch the Chronicles of Narnia movies with C.S. Lewis and talk to him about it"

This is possibly the best idea I've ever heard.

Growing Up

2011-07-14T03:36:00.003-05:00

My greatest fear is of having to grow up.

Of having Wendy grow old and Christopher Robin go to school. Of having Calvin saying goodbye to Hobbes and Andy giving up Woody. And of Aslan having to tell Lucy that she can no longer come to Narnia.

I think I've always feared growing up because it marked the unknown. Yet unlike dying and thinking about the beauty of heaven, growing up always led to thoughts of melancholy and becoming settled. Stagnant.

I feared the falling action, the resolution. Of the battle being won, the enemy being defeated, and the heroes left to go home and wonder "what next?" after having so many great adventures. The picture that comes most clearly to my head is from the movie, "The Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King", as the hobbits venture back home after saving all of Middle Earth. The world is good again, and the heroes are at the pub, drinking a few beers as they watch daily life proceed. Suddenly, there's an uneasiness as the four of them aren't sure what to do next. They've been on the adventure and their lives have been changed. They can't go on living as they used to.

Perhaps, in all honesty, I was afraid of the change. Of having to let go of the certainty that some things will always be the same. For someone with an overactive imagination like me, the worst change that could happen would be to grow up.

Yet, today, I grew up.

I can't describe how it happened. It would take too long to explain and none of it would make any sense, it was merely one of those things that only God and I had known about. Tonight, God merely showed me one little thing, insignificant to the rest of the world, yet it spoke volumes to me as those God moments that forever change your path always do. It came quietly, in the gentle whisper that could be completely missed if it wasn't for the fact that God spoke it directly to my heart, making it not a message for the world but a personal one that was only meant for me. I love how such a great and all-powerful God can become so "small" and intimate so that I can know Him better.

"You're not needed anymore"

That's the best I can describe my experience tonight because that's exactly what God spoke to me. In short, there was a sort of metaphorical passing-the-torch moment. Where someone picked up where I had ended, and I watched someone younger and newer grow up and find their place. My old one.

Those words should have stung. They did for a second. But that's the strange thing about growing up I suppose. You're not ready for it until it happens. Then, you realize that it's not as bad as it seems. In fact, after hearing those words, I was surprised to realize that I felt released. That, although I loved every minute of it, a burden had been lifted off me and I was let go. My job had been finished, there was no need for me to be there.

I think I understand a bit of it now.

When reading the stories, I guess I've always completely missed the last paragraphs. The part where yes, the adventure is over, but for someone else, the story starts again.

Frodo gives the almost completed book to Sam for him to finish. Wendy has a daughter who meets Peter Pan. Andy gives his toys to Bonnie. Harry Potter sends his children off to Hogwarts. The Redwall champions train new warriors to protect the Abbey. Eustace returns to Narnia to begin his own adventures.

This adventure is over. I did what I was called to do and made mistakes along the way. I grew from those mistakes and learned how to become a better person from it.

This chapter is over. The story is not.

"And for us this is the end of all the stories, and we can most truly say that they all lived happily ever after. But for them it was only the beginning of the real story. All their life in this world and all their adventures in Narnia had only been the cover and title page: now at last they were beginning Chaper One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on forever: in which every chapter is better than the one before.”

The Last Battle by C.S. Lewis

**Note: It may seem that I'm a little bit nostalgic about the final release of Harry Potter. While this is partly true, God just happens to speak to me sometimes through movies (and as you can tell, books)

**Another Note: This post on growing up seems strange coming from the fact that yesterday I wore footie pajamas to an event. I'm glad I'll never grow out of some things.

Soccer Mom

2011-07-08T02:09:00.006-05:00

After nannying two girls for most of the day throughout this past week as their mother went on a trip, my car has gotten rather cluttered. Instead of describing my week, here's a snapshot of what I cleaned out of my car tonight:

A ridiculous amount of fruit snacks
Garbage bags, the huge, heavy-duty kind that janitors use, because anything can, and probably will, happen
Socks, two pairs of three different sizes
Chuck E. Cheese tokens
Whoopie cushion from Chuck E. Cheese that immediately broke after being used once (can't say I was too disappointed about that)
Juice box straws. Which, by the way, I have become awfully talented in driving one-handed while the other hand searches for fallen juice box straws behind me/places straw into the microscopic hole of the juice box. Don't you just feel so safe with me on the road?
A fishing pole
A dog biscuit
More fruit snacks
Three bathing suits and towels, along with various pool accessories
Bug spray and sunscreen
Sidewalk chalk
Nine cups used for my favorite childhood summertime activity: catching crawdads
Two shoes that don't match
Various bits of candy

It's been a rather eventful week, especially since I've had to come to terms with officially becoming a soccer mom.

Shalom

2011-06-30T21:55:00.009-05:00

It's been a full month since I last wore shoes.

I wear flip-flops because it's easy to kick them off and run in the grass

It's one of my favorite things: feeling soft grass underneath my feet.

I keep Tennessee's reputation of people never having shoes alive.

You would too if you just tried it.

Almost everyday I walk with my dog at sunset, and we watch as God says goodnight with a marvelous array of colors.

I walk slow. So my dog can smell everything in the world and so I can look at the colors.

I like to listen to soundtracks while I walk. It brings more adventure.

Plus, music without words allows for my mind to wander.

To go where it needs to.

Sometimes my mind wanders to the places that I've locked away because it hurts to think about them.

You know what I'm talking about. The place your mind darts away from as soon as it comes near the door.

On these walks, the door opens a little bit.

I explore the hurt, wonder about the future, imagine all the possibilities

I beseech you to try it. Narnia's soundtrack is phenomenal but Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium's music is best.

Sometimes when people see me walking barefoot and my dog off her leash, they give me the evil eye as they drive by in their expensive cars.

They don't understand. They have perfectly manicured yards but never go outside to enjoy them. They must have forgotten what soft grass under their feet feels like.

As for my dog, she's never left my side. There's no point in tying up your best friend if she's never two feet away.

I promise I'm not a hippie. Just happy that summer is here so I can be free.

When it gets dark while we're wandering, I like to just stop and sit in front of this barn that's in the middle of the neighborhood and watch the fireflies dance their summer jig.

There's a small farm on the side of my subdivision. I like to imagine that there's an old man that lives there, sitting on the porch with a shotgun, ready to shoot anyone who comes knocking and suggesting that he can sell the farm for a good deal of money.

If I ever saw him, I think I'd like to be friends with him. Someone like that must have a lot of determination.

And hope for better days. Or maybe just memories.

If there's still light outside and it's an exceptionally glorious sunset, I'll climb out onto the roof of my house and watch the sunset.

My cat joins me. She enjoys watching people outside.

Usually this is when most people stare me down as they drive or run past.

As you can imagine, we get a lot of letters from the neighborhood association.

Nobody ever asks what I'm doing up there.

Nobody ever really talks to anyone anymore.

I'm scared neighborhoods like that are extinct.

If anyone ever did ask, I'd definitely invite them up to come join me

Once they saw the sunset, they'd understand.

They'd understand life. And how it's supposed to be full of moments like these.

The rest of my day is full of other things. Working, schedules, the 25 page paper that's supposed to be due in 5 days.

I'm on page 5.

But for that one hour, as the sun sets, my life is at peace.

Shalom: well-being of mind, heart, and body, individually and communally

Backstreet's Back Baby!

2011-06-23T00:29:00.003-05:00

Today, as I was getting home from work, my friend Andraya sent me the following text:

"The Backstreet Boys concert is tonight. Be ready in 45 minutes."

Andraya doesn't joke around when it comes to her Boys.

The thing with me and concerts is that, usually, I try to avoid them whenever possible. Fun fact: For a few years, I worked concerts/conferences for two Christian organizations for a few years whenever they were in town, and while it was so much fun, it was also completely exhausting and draining. Now, I can't go to an event at a huge stadium without wanting to give a hug and buy dinner for all the workers that are around. Seriously, next time you're at a concert, give your security man/T-shirt seller/ticket checker a big hug.

I also avoid them because of the loud music. Don't judge me.

However, Andraya doesn't take no for an answer. She picked me up, frustrated that I was wasting time to microwave some Easy Mac and headed off to Nashville.

A note about Andraya's driving: Her car has been nicknamed "The Rollercoaster of Death". I was one hour away from seeing THE BACKSTREET BOYS/NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK but I had to survive the Deathmobile.

After a few heart failures, we found a scalper, got our tickets and went to satisfy our middle school girl dream come to life.

We weren't the only ones with a dream to fulfill because the stadium was filled with 20+ year old women ready to swoon whenever their first crushes took the stage.

And you better believe that lots of swooning did, in fact, happen.

Now, if only JBiebs came to town.

My Adventures In Thailand!! (Photo Edition)

2011-06-20T20:07:00.009-05:00

On the Flight of the Gibbons, the world's longest zipline

Riding an elephant!

(Sorry about the bad quality of this one)

Hanging out with Thai Ronald

(Can I also mention that instead of apple pies, they have choices of corn, pineapple and broccoli pies?)

Visiting the long neck tribe

Shopping at the night bazaar every night

While at the night bazaar, I got the fish spa treatment. As in, hundreds of tiny fish ate all the dead skin and dirt off my feet. I never thought I was ticklish until fish swam in between my toes; then, I laughed uncontrollably for 20 minutes

Visiting an orphanage and playing with kids who had the most beautiful smiles on their faces

Visiting the Buddhist temple at Doi Sutep

Shoes outside the temple

And of course, meeting a regal beast

Book Liberation (Adventures At Goodwill)

2011-06-18T00:34:00.003-05:00

One of my favorite things to do is to go into thrift stores and buy classic books that look as if they haven't been touched in years.

It's great to give classic a new life again

Obviously We're Related Because We Both Have Tiger Blood

2011-06-11T13:25:00.009-05:00

Dreams really do come true.

A few weeks ago, I went to Thailand with my school's study abroad program to learn about the culture and do quite a bit of sightseeing as well. I'll write more about that later because, right now I have to tell you about the greatest thing I'll ever experience.

The moment I had been waiting for since I started thinking about Thailand two years ago happened the very last day we were in Thailand. Throughout breakfast, I had a certain amount of giddiness and nervousness because THIS WAS THE DAY I WAS GOING TO MEET A TIGER. The professors on the trip watched me with a certain amount of bemusement as they compared my excitement to their grandchildrens' hysteria at Disney World.

Except this is much cooler than Disney World. I get to pet a large, wild 500 lb. beast that could potentially rip my head off.

Yeah, way cooler.

We approach the compound housing 3 large tigers and the trainer warns us not to provoke the tigers, because although domesticated, they still have the ability to kill us in a matter of seconds. Then he asked who wanted to go in first.

You better believe my hand shot up first.

Then, I met the most beautiful beast to walk on the planet

Me and Lucky

So, what do you do when you meet a tiger?

Show him whose boss

Take that ferocious beast!

However, tigers sleep 18+ hours a day, so they really don't care what you do.

That's just how the king of the jungle rolls.

Since he was napping, I did take the opportunity to sing him a little tiger lullaby and rub his belly. Apparently tigers really liked getting their bellies scratched.

I also met Jennifer Lopez while at Tiger Kingdom. She also happened to be there in the same tiger enclosure as I was

Me and J.Lo

As the tiger trainer told me, "This J.Lo also has a very big butt"

There And Back Again

2011-06-07T15:48:00.006-05:00

In the past 3 weeks, I've been through 3 different countries and 4 different states

From the USA to South Korea to Thailand

And then 2 days later, a roadtrip from Tennessee to Florida for a camp

A total of 18,557 miles (78 hours) of traveling

And while I will share many stories soon,

Right now, I've got an immune system to rebuild

Strep throat meets Pink Eye

*And yes, I am basically on 7 medications for a sore throat

Harder Getting Out Than Getting In (Adventures in Being Trapped)

2011-05-09T21:01:00.009-05:00

First, I would just like to point out that nothing illegal happened.

Also, I know what it feels like to be one of America's Dumbest Criminals.

For the record, sometimes things happen that aren't planned out and there's nothing you can do but call for help.

The other day, my friend Ellie and I ventured out to our university's maintenance building. We were looking for some goods that were being thrown away after being replaced from the dorms and were hoping to hit some sort of second-hand jackpot. The physical plant compound consists of three old and abandoned warehouses surrounded completely by a six-foot tall fence with barbed wire gracing the top, daring any thieves to climb over. Since the gate was open, we simply drove in.

At the back of the compound is the greatest junkyard for decorating an empty house possible. Park benches were stacked against a wall, music stands with the school's name spray-painted lay piled in a bundle, a few chairs were strewn here and there and then, we saw the prize.

A personal hobby of mine is shopping cart wrangling. There's just something in grabbing a shopping cart that been left alone and taking it home with me to a better home that just brings satisfaction to life. Not stealing, my friends. Liberation. Giving the cart a better life. So when we saw the shopping carts sitting all alone, we knew we had to take them home and keep them safe. After all there are shopping cart kidnappers everywhere. Luckily, Ellie's SUV was big enough to hold an entire herd of carts, so we packed them and our other discoveries in and headed towards the exit.

Except that we could no longer leave. As we were debating on how to best fit everything into the car, the workers must not have realized that we were in the back of the compound and left for home. And locked the gate behind them.

Freedom can be so far away.

Claustrophobia began setting in a few seconds after the realization hit us. While I have always imagined cool places to be locked in for the night, i.e. libraries, museums, aquariums and zoos, junkyards have never been on my list. Too creepy.

We drive around looking for someone to be left working behind in the compound. Nothing. Search for another exit. Nothing. They should have called this place Alcatraz for it's unattaintable access to freedom. After talking about perhaps pulling a Fast and the Furious move and simply busting through the fence, we scratch that idea and call defeat.

We have to call Campus Safety.

Campus Safety. The security team at our university. The people who tend to destroy all fun activities at school with their appearance and who's parking tickets on my car are the bane of my existence. They are also one step below mall cops.

Calling Campus Safety is about as much torture as a person can receive. It's admitting that they have some importance in life and giving an ego-boost to their already gargantuan self-reputation.

Ellie starts the phone conversation like this: "I'll bet you've never heard this one before...". After her retelling of the details, the other line is dead silent. Finally, "Umm...wait...so you're telling us you're trying to break out...?"

Exactly.

So, after trying to figure out who possesses the keys for our prison, 45 minutes after our call for help, Campus Safety drives up and an "officer" walks up to the gate with a certain pompous swagger that all security guards have and grins at us.

"This is one for the books," he grins as he unlocks the gate and sends us into freedom.

At least they failed to notice our shopping cart herd coming out with us.

Devastation

2011-05-01T09:41:00.007-05:00

"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." C.S. Lewis

The tornadoes came and destroyed our city

185 homes completely devastated

We went yesterday to try and help pick up the pieces

Fallen trees were cut and taken to be burned

Food and water were distributed to those who needed it

Undamaged items were salvaged from demolished houses

We couldn’t get much though because the insurance companies have yet to come out and assess the damage
Midge's House

I went over to help Midge salvage her house but spent most of the time hugging her and listening to how she survived

Although I had taken a crisis intervention class for this very reason, I hated that I actually had to use it

She’s still in survival mode but the exhaustion and mourning is starting to set in
Aerial view of the neighborhood

Pain is mixed into the air as much as the smoke is from the burn piles

Everywhere there’s brokenness

But as we hauled trees away, more hands came to join us

Men and women from the community brought their chainsaws to help us

Churches and businesses made more than enough food for us and even passed out sunscreen

Neighbors emptied out their spare bedrooms for other families to join them in their homes

Friendships were made and healing started to grow

Through the sweat, laughter emerged.

Many things were destroyed Wednesday
But yesterday, community was created
"The American city should be a collection of communities where every member has a right to belong. It should be a place where every man feels safe on his streets and in the house of his friends. It should be a place where each individual's dignity and self-respect is strengthened by the respect and affection of his neighbors. It should be a place where each of us can find the satisfaction and warmth which comes from being a member of the community of man. This is what man sought at the dawn of civilization. It is what we seek today."
Lyndon B. Johnson

Thoughts...

2011-04-19T07:52:00.005-05:00

Tests, Papers, Getting to class

Due dates, Presentations, Finals

Engagements, summer jobs, weddings

End of the year parties, swimming, hiking

Movies, sunny days, laughter

But the only thing I can think about right now

Is how am I going to convince one health director who looks like a turkey

That I'm healthy enough to go to Thailand?

I just want to go

Adventures Throughout The Internet

2011-04-16T19:18:00.010-05:00

It's been raining for two days. My roommate and I haven't done anything but read books, draw and watch a movie every now and then.

It's been absolutely beautiful.

Here's some other beautiful things:

The Candy Shop from Whitestone Motion Pictures on Vimeo.

One of the most intense/beautifully made videos you'll ever see.

Then you'll be inspired to change the world

(Also check out the soundtrack!)

"Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square hole. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do."

--Apple Inc.

Looking at this blog makes me want to get married

Inheritance by Graham Cooke

"Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten."
--G.K. Chesterton

Drops like Stars by Rob Bell

Tiger Rising by Kate Dicamillo

More crazy cool things that you can fin online: bit.ly/creativeinternet

You Gotta Fight For What You Want (Adventures With Rabies)

2011-04-06T21:53:00.005-05:00

Today, I'm walking down an alleyway on my way to class because, as usual, I'm late. Then, I happened to spot my buddy Tempest next to a dumpster holding a yardstick and a pack of chewing gum. She's looking down at a metal grate on the ground which covers a sewer underneath.

"Whatcha doing Temp?" I greet Tempest but she's got a look of sheer determination on her face.

"Pooks, I'm gonna be rich! I just gotta find a way to get those quarters out!" She then points through the grate to show me two shiny quarters teasing us a few feet underneath us.

At this time, History of Modern Latin America has been forgotten. There's a chance of us getting rich here and I'm talking Washingtons here.

We start working with the drive of diamond miners as we lower the yardstick with a giant wad of citrus gum stuck on the end into the sewer but each time we come up empty: our hands are too big to fit through the holes and we're only a few inches too short. "A stick! A stick! Get me a stick!" I run to try and find a good stick to lengthened our yardstick. The first one is too thick to fit through the holes so I try to find another.

At this time, some of the administrators of my university enter the alley, finished with a meeting. They see us cheering and groaning as we get closer and closer to our prize and shake their heads at the street urchins who will do so much to get a few cents. "Oh the lengths some of those kids will go to pocket a few cents," is what I'm sure they were all thinking at the moment. They just don't understand.

It's at this time when I realize that I have a class I'm supposed to be sitting in right now. I make Tempest promise me to update me on her status and head towards caudillos and socialist parties.

About ten minutes later, I receive a text from Temp:

"Found a thinner stick and taped it [onto the yardstick]...when I went for the second one, a raccoon popped its head and stared me down."

Unfortunately, our get rich quick days were ended by the master bandit himself. And you wondered were all the change thrown into fountains went.

God's Just Having Disco Night At The Bowling Alley

2011-04-04T21:51:00.003-05:00

There's a storm raging outside tonight

Bright flashes of light, loud rumblings of thunder and shuddering as the house quivers under the torment of beating water

Tonight, I'm doing homework by flashlight

Not because the power went out but because it's too beautiful of a storm to ignore

The Donut Theory

2011-03-27T22:22:00.006-05:00

I had an adventure this weekend as I spent the weekend helping out with a youth group retreat. Earlier in the year, I was given the phenomenal opportunity to work with a ministry that works disciple now weekends all across the southeast and these weekends have been by far the greatest part of my week.

I mean, who doesn't love staying up until 3 am with middle and high schoolers as we talk about the two greatest subjects in the universe?:

Jesus and Justin Bieber

Also, I feel compelled to inform you of the greatest piece of advice ever bequeathed upon me, given to me by a fellow leader:

"The man of your dreams should be like a donut: hot and holy."

Currently listening to: "Like A Lion" by David Crowder* Band

Love Never Fails

2011-03-23T11:12:00.001-05:00

**I actually wrote this about a month ago. I decided to wait a while to post it because I still needed time to process my life and to have my time of solitude so I could grieve. I thank the people who have been there with me during this time, you have all been very important to my life.

(Original date: 2/23/11)

I lost a dear family friend this weekend, Uncle Stan. He wasn't related to me in any way, we just called him that because we wished he was actually related to us. He was a great guy and one of the few adults I felt comfortable using sarcasm around because he didn't mind when I retorted everything he said with smart-aleck comments. He was just a cool guy to be around.

He was also my dad's best friend.

All weekend long, I was pretty hurt by God. I felt like I was rejected. Abandoned. Why would God, who took my father away 7 years ago, also take away the man who was like my second father? Wasn't the pain I experienced the first time bad enough? Had God not seen my pain?

How could You do this to me?

Numb, I ended up walking around the streets in the nearby city. Not really going anywhere in particular, just ambling along. Wandering.

For three days, I would just wander around town for hours. Walking up and down streets, turning left or right on whims. Going in no certain direction.

I wasn't trying to go somewhere, I was just trying to get away from God.

But He doesn't give up

I did everything I could to shove God away. I told God how angry I was at Him. I made threats against Him. I just wanted to run away from Him.

But I couldn't. This weekend was a glorious spring day with 65º degree weather, the sun shining and everywhere plants were blooming.

And my heart was weeping.

A little girl was swinging on a tire swing. The smile on her face was so radiant as she was flying through the air, unstoppable.

Yet, everything about my life had suddenly stopped.

Butterflies were dancing among the flowers. Life was everywhere to be seen.

But, all I could think about was death.

It was spring and the world was abundant with joy. And at this time, I detested the world with every fiber of my being. How dare the world be beautiful while my world fell apart. Didn't anybody realize that I was breaking inside? My heart was wrought with grief, mangled from the pain and exhausted from the outburst of emotion.

And the world still went on its everyday business, having a glorious day in the process

I kinda felt like God was laughing in my face.

Do you not care?

That's when I pushed God away harder. Shoved him behind me and ran from Him as quickly as possible.

After a long while, I ended up behind a couple jogging. I was pretty miserable by that time, shuffling along, kicking a rock every few feet, not caring about the beautiful day going on its merry way like an overtly obnoxious Disney movie. All I needed now was for some chick to come out of nowhere singing about true love and finding her Prince Charming with baby rabbits and deer trailing along for it to truly sting.

But instead, I looked up and saw the couple in front of me, jogging. The man had a mechanical arm and the lady had a prosthetic leg. I watched as they encouraged each other to keep going. To not give up.

And at that moment, only one thing came into my mind:

They overcame.

They too, had had their fair shares of struggles. They probably asked a lot of questions to God and wondered where He was. There were probably many mornings when they had no motivation to get out of bed.

But somehow, they got up.

And there were probably going to be many more days for them that are full of pain and anguish.

But there were also be days were they look back to see how much they have conquered.

And those days will be worth much more.

__________________________________________________

Last night, I was sitting outside admiring the glorious stars. In that quiet moment, I broke down once again. I just wanted to know where God was.

Why would He leave me at a time like this?

And very, very quietly a gentle breeze said, "I am with you."

That's when I knew. That during all that time of walking, during those previous days when I had done nothing but push God away, He had been with me all along. Throughout all that time, He had never once given up on me.

Because Love never Fails.

"Love is patient. Love is kind. Love isn't jealous. It doesn't sing its own praises. It isn't arrogant. It isn't rude. It doesn't think about itself. It isn't irritable. It doesn't keep track of wrongs. It isn't happy when injustice is done, but it is happy with the truth. Love never stops being patient, never stops believing, never stops hoping, never gives up. Love never fails."

--1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Another Thing To Check Off The Bucket List

2011-03-11T16:02:00.005-06:00

Sorry for not updating in a while, there was a reason for that but I'll go into that another time.

For now, I'd like to update you on another adventure:

That my friends, is a real lion cub. And I'm actually petting him.

And yes, that is my "I can't believe I'm petting a lion" face.

Oh, also tonight, I'm sleeping in a room with a dead guy.

But that's a whole other adventure.

Love Never Fails

2011-02-23T22:32:00.008-06:00

(Original date: 2/23/11)

He was also my dad's best friend.

How could You do this to me?

Numb, I ended up walking around the streets in the nearby city. Not really going anywhere in particular, just ambling along. Wandering.

For three days, I would just wander around town for hours. Walking up and down streets, turning left or right on whims. Going in no certain direction.

I wasn't trying to go somewhere, I was just trying to get away from God.

But He doesn't give up

I did everything I could to shove God away. I told God how angry I was at Him. I made threats against Him. I just wanted to run away from Him.

But I couldn't. This weekend was a glorious spring day with 65º degree weather, the sun shining and everywhere plants were blooming.

And my heart was weeping.

A little girl was swinging on a tire swing. The smile on her face was so radiant as she was flying through the air, unstoppable.

Yet, everything about my life had suddenly stopped.

Butterflies were dancing among the flowers. Life was everywhere to be seen.

But, all I could think about was death.

And the world still went on its everyday business, having a glorious day in the process

I kinda felt like God was laughing in my face.

Do you not care?

That's when I pushed God away harder. Shoved him behind me and ran from Him as quickly as possible.

And at that moment, only one thing came into my mind:

They overcame.

But somehow, they got up.

And there were probably going to be many more days for them that are full of pain and anguish.

But there were also be days were they look back to see how much they have conquered.

And those days will be worth much more.

__________________________________________________

Last night, I was sitting outside admiring the glorious stars. In that quiet moment, I broke down once again. I just wanted to know where God was.

Why would He leave me at a time like this?

And very, very quietly a gentle breeze said, "I am with you."

Because Love never Fails.

--1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love Is Waiting

2011-02-10T22:56:00.004-06:00

Tonight, my adventure was filled with construction paper, glue, the cool scissors that cut awesome designs and of course, a chick flick as I prepared for one of my favorite holidays

More to come on who's getting them soon!

My Thoughts On School At The Moment

2011-02-08T21:10:00.004-06:00

Dear School,

WHAKD(*^&%^%((*(YDHJKFAHS98Y 89Y*DY( 8YD 89YDY* *S 8 7* T 8T^ &*r ^( ^7 89& (06 ^ r *u T& u( yJ MlK ; :L > ?" l uyR 8Y yy 7T 7y oUY OIY U i 8 89^ 7$6t*Y &WT#*UQ)#&()#(*#Q(#^(#$@)*$)(!@&98490280b ( $()$()@ 19024 2942108 4210842 204 #%U#(U$U%O#U %O#U(U( U#() %) $%( (% $)%(Q)( @(QT( **#(**((@U*(# *( @*( *(! * * ^(**()*#*(! (!@ ) @^*%$!@@!@% !! @!@%% !@% % %!^@! $!@$% !$$%$% $% $% DKFAJKDFKS DFIJSDIOF 3 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@.

Just thought you should know my feelings towards you.
--Pookie

One Way To Eliminate Stress

2011-01-20T23:14:00.004-06:00

I was a little stressed today.

Outlines, papers, due dates, schedules...it started piling up on me and freaking me out

It even got so bad, I started cleaning my room just to get my mind off things.

But then I realized that I hate cleaning more than anything else.

So, to take out some stress, I made a Post-it note tree

Granted, I still have a lot of leaves to make, but it beats cleaning anyday

Also, you should listen to this song, it's quite beautiful and portrays my love for Narnia exactly:

"There's A Place For Us" by Carrie Underwood

Failing The Easiest Class In The World

2011-01-19T20:44:00.002-06:00

"Teacher? When am I ever going to use cursive in my life?"

"Never. Unless you want to become a teacher, in which case you have to learn it just to teach your students how to do it."

And that is how I will end up failing my class--because I don't know how to write in cursive (or read it either)

Weather Emergency Family Preparedness Plan

2011-01-11T12:32:00.004-06:00

Do you have a Weather Emergency Family Preparedness Plan??

Well, you should. At least that's what all the forecast websites told me. And because in Tennessee, we've never seen more than two inches of snow (today we have eight!), the state has been declared in a "state of emergency" (stop laughing at us Minnesota). And so, under weather.com's commands, I've taken a quick inventory of things we have in case the roommates and I get snowed in.

Shovel: nope. We're a household of college girls, why would we ever need a shovel prior to this?
Snow tires: negatory, captain
Flashlight: probably somewhere around here. Granted, we don't even have batteries. On second thought, I do have a headlamp because those things are really fun to run around with in the pure darkness (and because it makes me feel cool)
Food: 20+ cans of tuna, three frozen pizzas, tea and snow cream--we may freeze to death but we definitely won't starve to death (although our taste buds may hate us)!
Tent: Why, yes as a matter of fact we do

And so, because we want to take all the precautions we can, In case the ceiling collapses from the INTENSE weight of the snow, we've decided to build a tent in the living room...just in case

Note: Aslan spent the night in there with us because lions generally do not enjoy cold weather--although Aslan LOVES snow

It Looks Like Narnia Outside

2011-01-10T18:18:00.004-06:00

Friends, meet Hill of Awesomeness

Since Tennessee has never seen snow at the 7 inch mark since the Blizzard of '93 (or even snow higher than 2 inches), today was declared a snow day and people like me spent the day sledding and enjoying this rare phenomenon. I wish I could have gotten a better picture of the Hill of Awesomeness but it's actually about 25 feet high and very steep. With my trusty friend, the sled that I got for Christmas, I spent the entire day experiencing what my childhood was always lacking: snow greatness

My body is totally going to hurt in the morning

Light Blue Is Sooo The New White

2011-01-08T02:20:00.002-06:00

Fun fact: When washing your white clothing, don't think to yourself, "Eh, I'll just throw these new dark blue jeans in with them"

I am now the proud owner of three baby blue V-neck shirts.

Whoops

2010

2010-12-31T17:57:00.010-06:00

Every year, I do a New Year’s 100 Resolutions list for things to live by that I try to accomplish within the year.

This year, I lost my sheet.

Whoops

But it's okay, I still made some awesome memories.

With that being said, here are a few memories I have acquired the past year:

Þ Having God discussions while watching the sunrise on the beach

Þ Moonlit skinny-dipping

Þ Sleeping in the middle of Alumni Park in a tent

Þ Roadtrips to Kentucky, South Carolina, New York and Pennslyvania with awesome people

Þ Potlucks, my favorite thing ever

Þ Seeing old friends, and realizing that we're still friends after all this time

Þ Drinking tea and pondering life with good friends

Þ Sleepovers...with lots of giggling involved

Þ Canoeing down the Duck River and pretending to be in Lord of the Rings

Þ Camping out in downtown Chattanooga in a Box City

Þ Watching thunderstorms

Þ Hiking

Þ Bonding with my roommates in God’s country, Gatlinburg, TN

Þ Sleeping out under the stars

Þ Seeing beautiful people get married

P.s. I didn't take this picture but this fantastic lady did!

Þ Laughing so hard I cried

Þ Crying for the first time since God knows when

Þ Crying more than once in a year

Þ Being part of a suicide hotline and talking to great people

Þ Creating beautiful art

Friends, let's make more memories next year, shall we?

"No, life cannot be understood flat on a page. It has to be lived; a person has to get out of his head, has to fall in love, has to memorize poems, has to jump off bridges into rivers, has to stand in an empty desert and whisper sonnets under his breath... We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn't it?" --Donald Miller

Merry Christmas!

2010-12-27T02:49:00.003-06:00

As you lay around your couch, stuffed after eating ridiculous amounts of food and not having gotten out of your jammies yet (and it's after 12), feel free to check out this retelling of Christmas:

I'm Done With Finals...Now What Do I Do?

2010-12-09T23:48:00.005-06:00

The other day I finished everything...papers, projects, exams, those errands I've been meaning to do since October, and I even balanced my checkbook.

And so, once I had finished all those pressing matters that have been constantly bearing down on me, I found myself sitting on my couch, with nothing to do.

I would check my phone every few minutes, nothing. No movies I felt like I've been desiring to watch. No places I could go. Nothing I could really do in that span of time.

It was the strangest feeling, the feeling of being bored. An old acquaintance that came into my living room and settled in, and I wasn't really sure how to start the conversation. The feeling of boredom was the awkward pause when both members of the party's eyes are shifting, trying to find some sort of common ground and aren't quite sure what to do with their hands.

So I went to bed. At 9:30 pm.

A favourite life motto of mine is: When in doubt, sleep it out

It helps with all of life's problems. Except perhaps insomnia in which case I recommend watching Bob Ross or listening to the Bible in Spanish.

Anyways, once I woke up and started to find things to do, here is what I found:

Pray by Justin Bieber. The song got stuck in my head and I honestly have to say that it's his best yet. I'm impressed Bieber, job well done.
Make an origami elephant out of a dollar bill. Don't feel bad about leaving waiters crummy tips anymore--just leaving them a beautifully folded pachyderm.
I just want you guys to know that I just spelled pachyderm correctly the first time without consulting a second source. Definitely one of my greatest accomplishments of 2010
"I will have nothing to do with a God who cares only occasionally. I need a God who is with us always, everywhere, in the deepest depths as well as the highest heights. It is when things go wrong, when good things do not happen, when our prayers seem to have been lost, that God is most present. We do not need the sheltering wings when things go smoothly. We are closest to God in the darkness, stumbling along blindly."
Madeline L'Engle: Fascinating lady, brilliant writer. I've been going down to the public library and spending my days reading books. Like actually enjoying reading instead of rushing through a book to write a paper on it. Anyways, I just read A Wrinkle in Time the other day and loved it.
Calvin and Hobbes. Also picked this up from the library. I hope my offspring end up being that awesome
The Introvert's Corner: An interesting blog with articles about introversion. Being on the extreme introverted side (I'm an INFP), this was like connecting with folks who finally understand

Enjoy!

Night Stroll

2010-12-05T01:16:00.005-06:00

The lights go off.

He wakes, shakes his mane, and stalks off as the night air is crisp and the stars are twinkling from high above. The lion nudges the window open and heads into the darkness. It's silent outside and no one is around, just the way he prefers it. He saunters down the street, stretching his legs from sitting all day and swishing his tail, slicing the cool air. He stops at a house and watches as an innocent child sleeps and growls at the nightmares, chasing them away. He keeps going, stopping every once in a while to nose through an empty Taco Bell wrapper. The lion strolls alongside a river until finally he finds a field.

Then he really comes alive

The magnificent beast begins to run, chasing after fireflies, leaping from park bench to park bench, madly on the chase as the lightening bugs taunt him as they flicker for a second then quickly disappear. As other nocturnal creatures come out of their homes, the lion playfully stalks them, pretending each one is a wildebeest out on the savannah. He pounces but never attacks them--he has no need to eat them.

Once he has finished startling his prey, he heads for a grassy knoll, high above the rest of the park. There, he looks up at the great stars above him, watching as stars shoot across the sky, too far away for him to catch. He sits and ponders his life and waits for an adventure to arise. There isn't one tonight but he'll always try again tomorrow.

The world around him starts getting brighter and it's time to head back. The glorious creature takes one last careless swipe at a noisy cricket and leaves. Although some people are already starting their day, the lion ambles down the city streets. He isn't afraid of them spotting him, they are too concerned with punctuality and traffic to notice a lion meandering down the sidewalk. At last, he climbs back through the window and plops back onto bed and Aslan Judah Mufasa settles down to sleep.

After all, lions do sleep nineteen hours a day.

Second Place

2010-11-29T22:04:00.006-06:00

Seven times my intramural team has come in second place

To come so close, yet to never win the limelight

To have to watch the winning team win shirts, get pictures, and gain respect

To have to get condolences, a "maybe next year", to quietly pack up your things and go home

Many more times than seven, I've come in second place in other things in life

To watch others receive the recognition, to wonder what it must feel like

One day

__________________________________________________________

Tonight, I sulk. I think about the things I could have done better. I tell myself how disappointed I am in myself

Then, I shower off the feelings of defeat and regret. I put on warm pajamas and I go to bed.

Tomorrow, I try again.

I go back to work. I build upon my strengths and locate my weaknesses. I continue the journey

Because tomorrow brings hope.

And I pray that the hope never runs out

A Day In The Life Of A College Student---Writing A Paper Edition

2010-11-16T11:26:00.005-06:00

Type. Type. Type. Stare at wall and zone out. Type. Type. Hit a mental block. Go on sporcle.com and try to name all the Disney movies by character. Repeat this step 3x. Realize that you haven't eaten in a few hours. Find food. Eat food while surfing Facebook. Food break goes on longer than normal due to Facebook stalking boys/people you haven't seen since high school and never talked to while there. Realize that it's getting late. Research some more for paper. Scourge internet for scientific sounding article. Remember a youtube video that a friend mentioned. Watch video. Laugh. Post on friend's wall that you watched said video and loved it. Share it with another friend on Facebook. Go back to the article with big terminology. Decide it's too confusing and go to Wikipedia for a clearer explanation. Type. Type. Check out Pandora stations. Find the most obscure one possible. Type. Type. Type. Need change of environment. Go to a serene place like library or reading room. Check Facebook to see if any friends are in library/reading room. Type. Zone out. Realize that you've been staring at the person across the room and they caught you. Frantically start typing again. Double space paper. Realize that it's not long enough. Write a few obscure sentences. Still not long enough. Resort to making the periods a bigger size. Still not long enough. Make the commas bigger too. Hope that professor counts half page as a full page. Save paper under something like "Stupid Research Paper for Satan's Class".

Print.

Go eat some ice cream. It's been a productive day.

Hoping That Greater Things Are Yet To Come

2010-11-10T21:33:00.005-06:00

The flu. Group projects. Sleepless nights. Unfortunately those are the things that reign my life at the moment.

I wish I could go on about other, more beautiful things that are going on but I can't.

English grammar is demanding my attention for my exam at 7:45.

But here's a quick glimpse of beautiful things happening in my life:

-"Falling In Love In A Coffee Shop" by Landon Pigg: this could be the most beautiful song I've ever heard

-The girl I've been tutoring this past semester told me she loved me. It was a particularly rough day so just hearing those words brightened my day

-I am the Messenger by Marcus Zusak: Fantastic, brilliant, original, written by an Australian so that you'll want to infuse "bloke" "mate" and "sheila" into every sentence

-For possibly the first time since entering college, I've really wanted to go home. And it was in that moment that I've realized that although being independent is grand and life changing, one of the greatest feelings is to be taken care of.

-This quote:

“I am only one, but I am one. I cannot do everything, but I can do something. And I will not let what I cannot do interfere with what I can do.”

--Edward Everett Hale

-Laying down in bed and saying, "Thanks God. Today was especially awesome."